By FRANCINE MEDINA
Not all children are born from the flesh. There are those born from the heart. Hotelier and chef Mikel Arriet and his son, Jon, know this all too well.
On his 36th birthday, hotelier Mikel Arriet first met Jon, a sweet-faced four-year-old boy with a backpack. They caught each other’s eye, but in that instant, the little one started to cry. “I think he was scared of me,” says the 6’1” Spanish national and heralded general manager of Anya Resort in Tagaytay, who had come to pick up Jon as his foster father.
That day, Mikel brought food for everyone to enjoy. He remembers some kids playfully clinging to his arms and legs. But not Jon, who kept his distance. Soon, the social worker at the children’s foundation instructed him to bring Jon home despite the boy’s tantrum. Good thing that Jon eventually got tired and fell asleep in the car on their way home.
It took some time for Jon to warm up to his foster parent. It took exactly 15 days before Jon shifted from calling him “Kuya” to “Daddy.” After six months, Mikel finally heard the words he had been wanting to hear. “The social worker assigned to his case invited us to attend a birthday party that they had organized for all the kids. When we arrived, Jon was introducing me to his friends as his father. And after an hour of playing, he told me, ‘Dad, we can leave?’”
With a smile on his face, this dad now tearfully recalls. “It was a beautiful moment. I saw that he was ready to embrace his new life and there wasn’t any pain or regret at all.”
Natural course
Being an adoptive parent had been a life-long prayer for Mikel: “I’ve always wanted to be a father and when I was younger, I knew in my heart that I wanted to adopt a child because I know there are many children who have been abandoned, who are without parents and families and who need to be cared and loved for as well. That’s sad to me and that’s why I wanted to adopt a child.”
He looked into a non-profit foundation advocating for the rights and welfare of disadvantaged children — those who have been abandoned, homeless, abused, forced into labor and other conditions that put their lives at risk.
As part of a stringent adoption process, he was matched with Jon by the DSWD-licensed foundation. The next six months would have Jon under Mikel’s foster care, who was required to visit and submit a report to the DSWD on the boy’s progress at home and school. In the sixth month, a social worker conducted a home visit and evaluation. She asked Mikel if he would be pursuing the legal adoption. And, of course, he said yes.
For the hotel executive, it was the best decision he had ever made. He was a natural. “It never crossed my mind that it would be difficult or that he was complicated. It was so easy and natural for me. My son, Jon, is a very good child. He never gave me problems. He’s even doing well in school. I’m very lucky. As a human, he has a very big heart,” he says. “Life will find a way to help us raise our child. It is in our nature to love and care. It always starts from the heart.”
Life enriched
Jon, now a 16-year-old high school student, is getting to be a creative soul much like his father. Jon plays the piano, loves music and enjoys working with computers. His father had asked him what he wanted to study in college and he said he wants to dabble in technology.
“I know technology is very broad so I asked him, can you be a little more specific?” he lets out a gentle laugh. “Of course, I won’t push him to do anything he doesn’t want. I do know it’s hard to make those kinds of decisions at that age. Whatever he wants to pursue, I’ll be supporting him as his father.”
Father and son have their regular conversations about seemingly light topics, but for Mikel, each bonding moment with Jon is always a special time to learn more about the jolly child who is growing up to be a diligent and well-mannered young man.
Early on, his son was diagnosed with dyslexia, a learning disability in reading. Mikel says he also has dyslexia, and knowing what he now knows about his son’s condition and how to overcome it has likewise helped him process his own experiences as a young person with the disorder. He says, “It made me understand myself better, too.”
For his part, Mikel has enrolled his son in a Montessori school that he observed fitted his child’s special needs. “There, he really bloomed like a flower and gained more confidence in himself. I’m very proud of him,” shares the doting dad.
Being a father has given him a broader and more compassionate mindset, Mikel believes. A seasoned executive in the hospitality field and a long-time resident in the country, he also served as operations director of the exclusive Club Punta Fuego in Batangas for 12 years before moving to luxurious Anya Resort.
“I think fatherhood has made me more human, more understanding of what other people need,” Mikel reflects. “When parents at the resort come to me and say, ‘Oh my child needs this,’ or ‘This is our family’s experience,’ I tend to listen, become more empathetic, because I know. I’m a parent, too. So, that’s how being a father has also changed me. I call it being more human, more sensitive to others.”
